My way. My ideas. My hopes. My dreams. You are going to have to pry them out of my cold hands to get them away from me. I'm like a little child, holding on with everything I have. Imprints of my fingernails in my palms as I refuse to let go.
Releasing is hard.
Have you ever held a balloon on a string, just to have it fly away? You feel the ribbon slipping through your hands and suddenly the balloon is out of your reach. It's because you weren't holding on tightly. This makes children cry, but I am fascinated with watching a balloon in the sky, getting smaller and smaller in the distance as it floats along with it's string trailing behind. It paints a beautiful picture of letting go.
I need to do that with the things I have clenched in my fists, yet it's hard to let go and release those things I hold dear.
But a thought came to my mind.
I can hold things loosely, because HE holds me tightly.
"Even your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast" - Psalm 139:10
If he is holding me tight, then I have to trust that he cares about what is in my hands. And if I trust him, I can release those things that I really care about and that are really important to me and I still know that he is in ultimate control of everything.
Maybe some things I'll never see again. But maybe I'll find even better things on the journey. Maybe he wants to put some new things in my hands but I can't pick them up because I am still holding onto the old.
So, I have decided to open my hands wide up.
Give it all back to him.
There is peace in that.
There is peace in him.
Him holding us tightly, allowing us to let go.