Author of "Wild at Heart" John Eldredge and his son Sam joins Kirk Giles (President of Promise Keepers Canada) and Ron Mainse for a panel discussion on what makes a man tick.
A man needs a subtle assurance inside to know that he has what it takes.
Whether it is going for a job interview, finishing a degree or asking the girl of his dreams to him, he needs the subtle assurance to know that he can handle it.
In the modern Western society now, there isn't a set rite of passage for a boy to know when he is "officially" a man. The rites of passage in the society now are: at this age, I can drive a car, at this age I can get drunk etc. This is the reality in our culture right now.
As Kirk points out, there is so much power when an older man, especially a father, can look at his son and say, "You are a man". That speaks volume into the heart of a man.
There are so many young boys out there now who are trying to grow into young men. However, they don't have that dad or father figure in their lives to help them through.
This is where God the Father steps in.
In the core of Christianity is Fatherhood.
We have a Father who loves us. We can ask God to father us. And He will.
This is also where men who understand the Father's love and who they are in Christ to step in and guide the fatherless generation through life.
Often times, we missed the "warrior" in young men. The church has been telling them that the goal of Christianity is that they become really nice guys - meek and mild.
Jesus is a warrior! He was the one who made a weapon to clear the temple. He was the one who calmed the storm at a command. He is also going to be the one who will be leading an army at the end times.
And that is in the DNA of every little boy!
We need to start showing the young men that they are needed and we are in the midst of a great battle against evil. They have a place in God's great story. With the help of God's Spirit, they can be a part of this story and they have what it takes.
When it comes to the issue of pornography, "you have to understand what they are looking for. The big surprise is that it is not about sex," explains John. "It is about love and it is about validation."
Men has an ache in their souls and they are taking it to pornography, hoping that it will ease the ache. For one thing, it make him feel like a man. So the less that he has of the Father's love, the less he will have a sense of inner strength as a man and the more vulnerable he will be to something that helps to ease the ache.
The ache in the soul for love and validation is good. That's something that God has placed in us. The issue is, if pornography works, then why don't we feel better after?
That's why we need to get the love and validation from the one True source - God.