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Trust

I keep getting in the way.

God says, "I will never leave you nor forsake you."  (Deuteronomy 31:6)  And I say, "But I'm scared.  I don't see You, so I'd better take it from here."

I keep getting in the way.

God says, "Give to Me all your worries and concerns and I will carry them." (1 Peter 5:7)  And I say, "Okay, here Lord … but I can't stop thinking about…!"

I keep getting in the way.

God says, "Be transformed by the renewing of your mind." (Romans 12:2)  And I say, "Renew my mind?  Too hard … I've tried and I can't."

So, God says, "Let Me make your thoughts and words pure and acceptable in My sight."  (Psalm 19:14)  And I say, "But I'm not important enough for You to waste Your time on."

I keep getting in the way.

God says, "I have watched you since before you were born.  I've heard every prayer, kept every tear."  (Psalm 139:15, 16; 56:8)  And I say, "But Lord, I'm afraid that the tears will come back."

So, God says, "When you walk through difficult times, I will be with you.  I will take care of you.  I guarantee it."  (Isaiah 43:2)  And I say, "But Lord, I'm worried about the trials I know are coming."

So, God says, "My Perfect Peace will guard your heart and your mind."  (Philippians 4:7)  And I say, "You already have my heart, Lord, but my mind?  You can guard it, but I'll hang onto the keys myself."

I keep getting in the way.

God says, "I will keep you in Perfect Peace if you only trust in Me."  (Isaiah 26:3)  And I say, "Ok, Lord, I trust you.  But the situation hasn't changed.  Are you sure You know what You're doing?"

I keep getting in the way.

God says, "Be filled with My Spirit."  (Ephesians 5:18)  And I say, "Ok, Lord.  But there isn't much room for Him in here."

So, God says, "Throw off those things that hold you back from experiencing true freedom in Me."  (Hebrews 12:1)   And I say, "Ok, Lord.  But although they're not pretty, some of them have grown rather comfortable."

I keep getting in the way.

Shouldn't God be frustrated with me constantly getting in His way? Shouldn't He get tired of me always seeing a dark side to His Light, a night to His glorious morning, the roadblocks on His road to righteousness?  Shouldn't He grab me by the scruff of the neck and bodily deposit me (none too gently) right where I belong, out of His way?  Shouldn't He?  Doesn't He have the right?  Of course He does.  He's God. 

But He doesn't. 

Like a wise and loving Father, He knows me for who I am.  Compassionate Eyes see the helpless child in tender need of a strong Hand.  Wounded Hands reach out to the lost soul in desperate need of a redeeming Saviour.  Gracious Love nurtures the fragile blossom in constant need of His replenishing Spirit. 

Sounds like a lot of work.  And it is, for Him.  He's not the problem.  And I think, deep down, we know it.

The problem is the person we see in the mirror.  The problem is the thing that gets us out of bed in the morning and drives us all day long… our God-given strength, which self-driven sin has turned into our greatest weakness.  The problem is our will.  You see, it has to die.  Die to itself.  Die to the part of us that is always looking out for number one. Die to the little voice inside of us that reminds us of all that we are not (…or die to the notion that we, alone, are enough).  Die to self.  We just have to. 

It is only as we allow this process to come alive that we will ever truly begin to live.  Live not for ourselves, for we know where that will get us.  Live not for someone else, for who knows where that will leave us.  To live for Him.  To wake up in the morning fueled by His will.  To surrender our thoughts, our words, our actions to God.  Every minute of every day.  Over and over again.  And to be convinced beyond all doubt as to why. 

He knows best.  He loves most.  He can be trusted.


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Related Verse
God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.
- James1:12 NLT
Related Prayer
Dear God, sometimes my "testing" season seems so long. Please give me courage to endure until the end. Help me not to bail! You said you would bless me for hanging in there - I will not give up on you or your promises. You are with me and will see me through this trial.